So, I don't think I'm going to publish that long, anti-chemo post that I wrote... because that should at least wait. It is not time for me to even be thinking about chemo yet. I should instead be focusing on the lumpectomy surgery, which happens one week from today!
I'm doing well preparing for it, both emotionally and practically, and I'm proud of myself for that. I'm not feeling very scared. I trust my medical team, and I have wonderfully supportive family and friends, and I'm also doing a good job taking care of myself... and I just have a strong gut feeling that everything is going to be okay, if I just breathe and trust.
This is what I'm doing/have done to prepare:
- I cleaned my whole room, and it looks beautiful! Now if I need to spend lots of time in here during recovery, it is actually a lovely space I'm excited to be in, instead of looking like the aftermath of a tornado. I even set up a meditation corner.
- I am gathering books and DVDs, ones that are either new or exciting enough to me that waiting until after surgery to read/watch them is making me impatient and annoyed - which is a good thing!
- I used Christmas money to stock up on necessities, like cat food, cat litter, cleaning supplies, kitchen stuff, shampoo, etc... boring things, but it will help.
- I pre-paid a bunch of bills due throughout January
- I bought a bunch of paper plates, which I am a little embarrassed about because I care about the Earth, but they are made from recycled paper and I certainly do not use disposable kitchen stuff REGULARLY... it just will help SO much to not have to worry about dishes when one of my arms isn't functioning properly. (We don't have a dishwasher!)
- I put all of my "post-surgery clothes" on a low shelf, so they are all together and easily accessible. Big flannel PJs, button-down shirts, shirts loose enough to step into if I can't get them over my head, velour and other soft stuff, etc.
- I bought one of those "old lady" pill boxes that organizes all of your meds for you (in my case, supplements and vitamins)
There is still more to do, but that's a great start! My hope, of course, is that surgery will go very smoothly and my body will be so strong and healthy that recovery will be a breeze... maybe I will feel great after just a couple days and we'll all be happily surprised to discover that all of this prep work I've done was unnecessary. BUT, just in case I AM housebound and weak, it will be great to be able to just stay in bed and not have to worry about whether I paid the electric bill or how I'm going to lug 20 lbs. of cat litter home from the store.
Also, right now I am rather obsessed with getting in as much yoga/circus/physical activity as I possibly can, to make up for the weeks (?) when I won't be able to do any of that. I've done a lot of yoga and circus this week already and have more coming up soon... it makes me happy and feels so good.
Big thank yous and lots of love to my family and friends who have helped me with all of these things...by helping me financially, loaning me shirts, getting my vitamins, making circus & yoga possible for me, and just being so kind to me!